Client: “I can’t concentrate when you keep tapping like that!”

Me: “I’m typing. This is the sound of typing.”

Client: “No, THIS is the sound of typing (he starts gingerly finger-pecking the keys). Notice the difference?”

Me: “Alright then, THIS is the sound of work actually getting done.”

Client: “It’s the sound of a jerk being a…jerk, if you ask me.”

(I don’t work for him anymore.)