A client wants to appear on the top of Google Search and asks me to run AdWords for his off-shore business. One Sunday evening at 9 PM I receive a frantic phone call.
Client: My business’ ad does not appear at the top of the page. What am I paying you for?
Me: We agreed to set an ad schedule to only run ads during working hours.
The next morning at 7 AM I receive another phone call.
Client: My ad is still not showing at the top of the page!
Me: It’s still not business hours.
Two hours later:
Client: Why don’t I see my business’ ad when I type in the search terms? It is supposed to show on top and we don’t even feature anywhere on the first five pages!!
Me: We agreed to run the ad only in [off-shore location]. Unless you are in that location you won’t see the ad in search results.
Client: Are you telling me that if I want to check up on your work I must go to that location?
Me: No. I send you a weekly status report with statistics from AdWords and Google Analytics.
Client: Let’s change that. I want to always see my ad on top when I search in Google.
Me: …Do you want to increase the budget from $160 to $800 per month?
Client: No. I would prefer if we spend less than $100 per month.
Me: Perhaps you should consider using a different service provider.
Client: Don’t get snippy with me! Have you seen what the other service providers charge?
I haven’t fired the client yet, but I did set my phone to automatically go into ‘silent’ mode between 5 PM and 8 AM.