I don’t like it. But, in your defense, something good might have distracted from our message.
Client: Why are you taking so long to finish this flyer?
Me: I sent a proof three weeks ago and I never heard back.
Client: Do I really have to sit here and make sure you remind me about what I am supposed to do?
Client: Why did you cancel my invoice?
Me: All unpaid invoices are cancelled after 48 hours. You delayed payment without explanation by two weeks last time, and this is the fourth time this has happened in a row.
Client: You didn’t give me 48 hours last time!
Me: No, we gave you two weeks, or 672 hours.
Client: My mistake, I thought it said days. Anyway, why did you cancel this invoice? I didn’t get an invoice from you, and it’s wrong anyway!
Me: You didn’t get an invoice?
Me: But it’s wrong?
Client: I think so. Can you check it? I didn’t get it.
Me: No, it’s been cancelled. You can reorder and can pay now, if you like. We have your order on file.
Client: I don’t get why you cancelled it! You said you allow 48 hours for payment! I didn’t get an invoice!
Me: We do, yes. It had been three days.
Client: Well yeah, the original invoice I got on Friday at 13:32 - it’s date stamped in my email, I can show you if you think I’m lying - but the reminder you sent me was only 40 hours ago!
Me: You’re looking at the invoice you said you didn’t get?
Client: That’s right.And it’s date stamped for Friday at 13:32.
I asked a client for the photos for their website. One month later, I repeated my request. A few months later and still no closer to the project’s final milestone, I sent yet another request.
Client: I’ve had them for six months. You just haven’t asked for them.
Me: I asked before you made the photos and after you said you had them.
I forward the client copies of these correspondences.
Client: Oh, I haven’t read my personal email in five months.
This entire conversation was taking place via that email address.
Hi, you should have come later. I’ll tell you about the work I need done after lunch. In the meantime, could you help me sync my iPhone?Client text after waiting outside her office for two hours.
How much extra do you charge for subliminal messages?
Client: I want to make a social networking website which I can earn profits from.
Me: Can you provide me with more details? What ideas do you have?
Client: I want it to be like Facebook and Twitter but people will have to pay to use it. I really can’t tell you any more than that.
Look, I don’t want to name drop, but I actually have a connection to Mike Zucker Big.
The following occurred during conversation in Gmail. I’m currently contracted to this client on a project unrelated to this conversation.
Client: Hey, do you think you could design a website for me?
Me: If you email me the information, I can let you know.
The client didn’t respond to the instant message and he never emailed me. I forgot about it.
A couple weeks later, he fired me from our current project, stating:
Client: You blew me off by asking me to email you the information. And you were rude enough not to follow up.