Hi, I was having a word with my nephew last night, who’s a bit of a web designer himself and I have a few new ideas for the site…
Can you please remove the iStockPhoto watermark on the photos? I don’t think it adds anything visually.
We were contracting out some work for an iPhone application and after a week of no contact with the developer this was the response I received:Me:
Him: (Seriously, this was his actual response)
You’ve been MIA for over a week now, please give me a call once you receive this.
Hey - I’ve been trying to reach you for a while but didn’t know your email. My MacBook Pro was stolen about 2 days ago and unfortunately my girlfriend kicked me out of the apartment. I’m looking for a quick way to replace my Mac without shelling out another grand (which I don’t have and obviously won’t until I get a new PC.) As you know my Grandfather passed away last Tuesday and I’m leaving for the funeral now. I’ll give you a call afterwards.
$1,000 is very expensive, you know. We only want a simple website with our current contents, and contact form as well. And don’t forget about CMS features. We want to add or edit content on our own. And the picture gallery, we want something that stunning and animated. The header should be animated as well. And our logo seems too old, can you design new logo for our company? But the best price we can offer is $300, and we think that’s more than enough
“Can you just press a button like in the Dove movie?”When asked to retouch a homely , non-model office admin snapshot into a gorgeous model for a cosmetics ad in order to save money.
Years ago, when I was (foolishly) re-selling Web hosting to my clients, I received a call one Saturday morning from my most difficult client, demanding to know why she wasn’t receiving her e-mail. After accusing me of gross incompetence, calling me every name in the book and threatening some sort of non-specified legal action, I calmly told her I would look into the matter and get back to her. I found the nearest computer, examined her account and saw that she had not read a single e-mail since her site launched…three months earlier. I called her back and asked whether she had ever set up the new account in her e-mail client (instructions for which had been provided to her — in writing – when the site was delivered). She had not.
Can you bill your design time in 6 minute increments
Client: “I don’t know about that logo in vector. Let’s use the picture I took of a christmas decoration instead”
Me: “But the logo won’t scale, and it looks horrible. Nobody uses a photograph of something as a logo”
Client: “Can we change the blue to be more red?”
Got a funny one from a Client a while back in reference to artwork that contained the picture above (a key element of the concept):
“The artwork is approved, but we need to replace the skeleton, we think it might be homosexual, and that could ostracise the audience, it’s a very masculine industry.”