Make the site have the contact information hidden between the lines, like subliminally. I want our clients to be smart enough to figure it out and when they do, I want them to remember the information forever.
Can you make our website track their webcams? I want to make sure that anybody on our site aren’t creepy-stalker types.
[For an ear, nose, throat and sinus center] “We want to design two ads that promote our services for treating sinus problems and hearing loss. But we want the ads to be funny. Can you make sinus problems and hearing loss funny?”
Client: “Why didn’t you call me over the holiday to see if I changed my mind?”
Client: “We want a no-right-click script so people, by which we mean paedophiles, can’t save pictures from our custom gallery of kids.”
Me: “But the gallery has an ‘email me this picture' form.”
Client : “That’s for parents.”
Client: “I need you to design me an internal company newsletter”
Me: “I’ll need the logo, brand guidelines, any relevant graphics and text.”
Client: “You’re not licensed to use them”
First point in the brief of a client :
The website will be available online.
Yeah, we’ll see.
“I don’t understand. I gave you the content yesterday. Why isn’t the site online?”
The client wanted packaging and ads for disposable razors designed. She wanted to develop a look aimed at the preteen age market. True story.