I think your fees are reasonable and I do look forward to working with you if I sense the Lord wants me to proceed.
Client: “Did you receive your payment?”
Me: “Yes, but there is a small problem.”
Client: “What is that? You got the cheque right?”
Me: “Yes, but you postdated it 6 months…”
While reviewing a quote for a rush job that would require working through the weekend, client commented that paying extra seemed wrong. His famous last words:
“I’m giving you a break from your family for two days, why should I be paying for that?”
Client: “Well, you just made a terrible mistake. We never want black or hispanic people in our advertisings. I’m sorry if this may sound a bit racist..but we are.”
Me: “The logo on your website does not need to be that large. It is not on a truck going 90 mph on the highway.”
Client: “Yeah, but it is on the information super highway.”
Change all text in safety calendar to a kids font like Comic Sans, we want it to look like a kid made the entire calendar.
“I want them to be rectangles, but I want them to have the feel of a triangle.”
When I used to get RFPs during our web development days, I would always refer to them as Requests For Pain.
Client: “$50?! That’s kind of steep don’t you think?”
Me: “No. It takes me about two hours to draw them.”
Client: “Well, what’s your hourly rate? I need to save money.”
Me: “$25 an hour.”
Client: “Good. I think we can work with that.”
Can you make the S into a dollar sign?