Those hands look like lesbian hands.
[After a video shoot]
“Can’t you just lower the resolution to Standard Def so I don’t have to pay the Hi Def price on the video?”
I showed this to my eight year old daughter and she didn’t like the colors.
The client wants you to add a circle TM after their tag line.
Client: “Can we put a ‘Z’ at the end of the name?”
Client: “To help with search rankings!”
The phrase ‘the sky’s the limit’. It sounds a little limiting. How about 'the sky’s no limit?’.
A client once gave me some text which included a spelling error. Instead of saying “you spelled that wrong” I tried to be tactful about it. I said I wasn’t sure about the spelling so I looked it up in the dictionary and discovered that it was spelled differently. Then the client insisted that there was a typo in the dictionary and we had to go to press with the spelling mistake.
This was for a series of employee training modules at a nuclear power plant:
“That chart about the different kinds of radiation makes the radiation seem too scary. Can you make it look friendlier?”
From Veer’s 2007 “Activity book” catalog
Client: “I took a Marketing Course so I’d like to submit some of my own ideas. The business cards have far too much wasted space so I want a calender on the back, people will love that and use it all the time. The newspaper ad is fine but I’d like you to get them to print it upside down, that way people will instinctively want to rotate the newspaper to read it. Pretty good ideas, don’t you think?”
Me: [Stunned silence]