A client wanted me to put together a PowerPoint presentation.
Client: Looks good. But can you make the picture show [insert complex photo manipulation instructions].
Me: Ok, I’ll have to use Photoshop for that.
Client: No. Why would you need to do that? Aren’t you a designer?
Me: Yes, but to do what you’re asking I will need to use Photoshop. Is there some problem with that?
Client: This is ridiculous. I hired you to do the work, not some photo shop.
Me: Oh. I see.
I was working with a client who wanted a menu for his
tavern. I created the three layouts and visited the pub to show them. The
client asked for feedback from everyone including the bartender, the server on
that evening, the chef, and the regular sitting at the bar. Since the “committee”
had now ballooned in size and number, there was no consensus despite my
best efforts to explain my design choices.
Client: I’m still partial to my original design…
Note: his “original design” was just a word document with bullet points.
Client: …but it
sounds like we need to finalize the content of the menu and see it with the
final list of menu items. Talk to the chef to finalize descriptions and present
me with finished draft in a few days.
Me: Ok, but I want you to tell which parts of these layouts you
like. I need to know how you want this menu to look.
Client: If I knew exactly how I wanted the menu to look, I would
type it up myself!
I meet with the chef to go over the final list of menu items and we finalize
prices and descriptions. I type up the menu to include the parts the owners
really liked (like that wordy description, now featured on the front page where
they demanded that it be placed), and the well-organized parts from my layouts.
Everything looks good and I present it to the owner.
Client: (Angry) Where is the layout I typed up? I gave you a
typed version of exactly what I wanted, and you just did whatever!
Can I pay you in $400 bills?Can I pay you in $400 bills?
Oliver Gwynne joins me to discuss the various obstacles and issues young freelancers have to face – high failure rates, a lack of business skills, perception issues, and pursuing fruitless shortcuts – and what they can do to overcome them.
If you found this episode at all helpful, please leave us a rating on iTunes.
—
Clients From Hell on iTunes
Subscribe on iTunes | Android | RS
Client: I visited WhatIsMyIP.com and my IP address is xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx. I can’t believe you gave me the wrong IP! This shows I am still listed on four email blacklists.
Me: That is the IP for your local internet service provider, not your domain IP address.
I had a client who didn’t want me to use Lorem Ipsum because, when translated, it was “mean.”
Consequently, all the text frames in the mockups I submitted to her said “Lorem lorem lorem lorem.”
This week’s Mighty Deal is five gorgeous typefaces for the price of one: Mighty Heart, Novelia, Cherryla, Brigent and Edelweis Script.
Each font sports a variety of fun and useful OpenType features including alternates, ligatures, swashes and more. From wedding invitations to badges, the typefaces are perfect for that elegant, handcrafted touch.
This bundle of modern fonts normally sells for $80, but for a limited time, all five fonts are only $12! (you’re saving 85% off the regular price!
I’m giving you freedom to do as you please, I know you’ll come up with something amazing. Just make sure it looks just like the logo I showed you but not too much.I’m giving you freedom to do as you please,…
So, if I put a black and white paper in and press color copy, it will add color to all the right spots, correct?Coworker FAR too impressed with the new copierSo, if I put a black and white paper…
Me: Hi! We have an issue with one of the shirts you ordered. It’s fine, but the size tag is incorrect – the tag says “Large” but it’s a medium like you ordered. Would you like us to print on this shirt or would you rather wait one more day so we can print a shirt with the correct tag?
Client: Whatever you think is best. I trust your judgement. If you say they are the same size, then go for it.
Me: Okay! I’ll print the mislabeled shirt and that way you can pick up your order Friday instead of Monday.
Predictably, however, when the client showed up his trust in my “best judgement” disappeared.
Client: Someone called me and said they printed on a large shirt instead of a medium shirt. I asked for a medium, not a large. I’m not paying for this.
Me: …