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Client: “Your portfolio and skills impress me quite a bit. I would really love to hire you for this job but before that I would like to ask you one question: are you from Iran?”
Me: “Yep, I was born there and have been living in America since I was 3. Is it important to you?”
Client: “I am not comfortable working with terrorists.”
I was hired by a client to develop a membership website. The scope of the work, timescales, deliverables and my fee were agreed and she even paid a deposit up front.
A couple of months later, on completion, we had a meeting where I demonstrated the application to her and we went through it thoroughly. A few days later she signed off and paid the remainder of my fee. She was a happy client (or so I thought).
Six months after completion & launch, she contacted me stating that she was not happy with it and demanded a full refund. I refused. She then sent a letter stating that if I did not give a full refund by X date, she would be getting her lawyer involved. Again, I refused.
A few days after her deadline I received a text message:
Client: On my way to my lawyer’s office now. Is there anything you wish to say?
Me: Yes. Good luck.
I did not hear from a lawyer, but the client contacted me a couple of weeks later, asking whether I was in a position to do more work for her!
Had a long-time client email me with a request for a website. I requested content, images, and logo file to start. He didn’t have anything. Instead, he just sent me links to a few of his competitor’s sites:
Client: Have a look at these and get back to me when you have something. I can’t answer too many questions – I’m a busy man.
I put a week into keyword searches, competitor analysis, and site comparison, and figured out what a site in his field would need. I put together a draft with stock composite images (he still hadn’t sent me any content), and sent it for approval on direction.
Client: Yes, please get it posted as I have people asking me about this site.
…What?
Me: It’s not quite ready to go up. Also, now is when you would request any changes you might want. Please call me so we can discuss changes so I can move ahead.
No response. He is,
after all, a busy man.
I sent several follow-ups over the next
few days. Nothing (he’s VERY BUSY). I kept working on the site and started to
get close to completion. I sent a link to get some feedback, once again
requesting that he call me.
No response. It’s okay, I think. He’s a very busy man. It’s Friday. Maybe he’s not checking his email.
Monday: no response.
Tuesday: no response. I send another follow-up email.
Wednesday I finally get a response:
Client: I looked
through it and I have to say I’m really disappointed. Please take a look at this
website. This site was done in-house in about 3 hours and under $100. I believe
this site is far superior to what you sent me. Please explain as I gave you
competitor site links and the site you sent me isn’t even close.
I heard my heart pounding in my ears. I
wanted feedback, but this was a little much for this late in the project.
Then I looked at the “under
$100” site, which he hadn’t sent me before. It was done by his wife, using a
free service template – which isn’t bad, except it wasn’t mobile friendly, the
pages weren’t formatted correctly, and the font size on all the content was so
small I actually had to increase my monitor’s settings to read it.
I responded to ask for more detailed
criticisms of the draft. He didn’t respond. He still hasn’t responded. So I
revamped the site, and resent that for approval. I’m still waiting.
He is, a busy man.
A lot of people talk about dodging bullets when it doesn’t work out with a bad client. This is the first time I dodged a missile.
I’m a ghostwriter. A client approached me to write a story he’d envisioned. He had characters, a universe, and a storyline he wanted me to actually write. I did some work for him, but had to drop the client when some familial issues came up.
Months later, I decided to check up on him and searched for him and his book. I found out that a) he found someone else to ghost write the novel for him and had actually published it and b) he was being sued for copyright infringment. Turns out all his “ideas” were stolen from an existing property that I wasn’t familiar with. Turns out, everything I wrote for him was fanfiction.
And that’s why you do research on your client’s ideas.
I met with a client in person for the first time after working remotely for months. I received this email the next day.
Client: Hi. Right. Sorry about this but we’re going to terminate our contract with you. Don’t get me wrong, your work is great, but I wish you’d been upfront at the start about your physical presence. It doesn’t fit our company image and we can’t have anybody supplying us services who doesn’t fit.
Some advice: join a weight-loss group and join a gym. You won’t need those ‘walking sticks’ after. This isn’t an insult – you’re good looking otherwise!
Maybe we can work with you in future if you fit our image. Please waive our contract termination fees as you didn’t tell us at the start you weren’t a good fit. Thank you.
About the "walking sticks" I "won't need." I’m disabled from a serious car crash 10 years ago.
I’m not waiving their fee.
My partner and I are in college and we do a lot of freelance work on top of our coursework. A Montessori school in the county wanted a new logo for their school, so our professor contacted us and we set up a consultation. We only had a short 45-minute window to make this meeting during lunch, when we get to the café we the client was sitting having lunch with his friends and told us he would be right over. 15 minutes later we reminded him that our time for the consultation was limited. After 25 minutes (out of 45) he finally sat down with us.
Client: So nice of you girls to help us out with this logo.
Me: We only have 20 minutes left, so we are going to make this short. What kind of logo do you want? Do you want us to redesign your whole graphic profile? What is the deadline?
Client: Oh, we thought maybe, since we are a school, and we want our identity to reflect the logo, we wanted you to come to our school and talk to the kids, pick their brains and let them come up with some ideas.
Now I’m exchanging confused looks with my partner as he goes on for 15 minutes on what sort of resources for logo-making he’s got in his classroom. From how many computers have Photoshop to all the arts and crafts supplies he has in a cupboard, and what our possibilities were. We try to interrupt and get him back on track, but he gets agitated, stating he IS talking about the logo, before continuing.
Me: So let me see if I got this; you want us to come to your school for a day and teach 20 preteens how to use photoshop on the 4 computers you have with that program, you also want us to kick off a drawing competition, set up a vote online for that competition, and let the kids vote on the best drawing and then you want us to format the winner into the logo?
Client: yes, I told you this, keep up.
Me: You want us to do this all in a day?
Client: Yes, well, you get a whole week off while waiting for the result but after that, we are going to need the logo pretty quick.
Me: We usually get paid a lump sum after a finished assignment in the XXX range, but since you want us to be teachers for a day we will have to discuss the hourly rate for educating your pupils and get back to you.
The client seems awfully confused as to why two college girls would want to get paid for their working hours and tells us that our professor had said we would do this for about XXX price.
Me: Yes, for a logo that WE design based on YOUR needs on OUR tightly scheduled time, you will get it for about that price, but technically you are not asking us to design a logo, but to set up and run a workshop with 20 kids for a day and then format the logo they design to fit your needs. AND you want us to put up a website to hold votes on for a week. This is a completely different assignment.
Client: How is it different, we want a logo and we want you to help us make it. What is the problem? We’re paying you XXX for the logo!
Me: I would love to explain in detail how these two assignments are completely different, but our time is up, if we had, say, 25 more minutes, I am sure we might have cleared things up or even come to an agreement, but as is, we need to go. We’ll be in touch.
The client seemed to take my snide remark about his tardiness as a positive, so when I emailed him the next day saying we were not going to take on the assignment, he waited 3 days before emailing me back. All he wrote was "ok.“
I do some freelance work for an Insurance company. One project I’ve been working on recently has gone on forever because of exchanges like this one:
Client: I really want the Billboard color to stand out.
**Me: **Okay, well here are some options. Do you like any of them?
Client: I think we’ll go with option “x”. Reduce the vibrancy of the background as we feel our logo is getting lost.
I change the background.
Client: Great. Let’s send this to print.
A few weeks later, after the billboard has been put up:
Client: The billboard looks awful! The background color doesn’t stand out. Please re-do it.
I have been repeating this endless cycle for four months now.
Maddy Osman knows how to sell herself and her services. That's because she started out in sales before becoming a full-time freelance copywriter and SEO specialist! In this week's episode, she tells Kyle how she built her business by doing (gasp!) free work, and why sometimes it's worth it for building that byline.
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Client: I need this by Thursday.
Me: Shouldn’t be a problem; I can have it done by Wednesday.
Client: No, you’re misunderstanding. Not Wednesday, Thursday.
Me: I meant that I’ll get it to you earlier than next Thursday.
Client: And I meant that I need this by Thursday.
Me: Okay, I’ll send it next Thursday, then.
Client: You’re just not getting it. I need it by THIS Thursday.
Me: But today’s Thursday…
Client: Yeah, which makes all this time you’re wasting so confusing.
I usually work in animation, but I also do illustration commissions. A friend who is an up and coming model asked me to produce an illustration to post to her followers as a birthday gift.
Client: Can you draw a picture of me, one like the one you drew of yourself?
I produced a rough ink drawing. It’s not cartoony (like mine was), but I had a hunch she would prefer a more realistic drawing. Considering her modelling background, I didn’t want to be unflattering. It looked good.
Me: Ok, here’s a drawing I did of you. I hope you like it.
Client: Oh! It’s great.
She uploaded the illustration.
A few weeks later:
Client: so when are you going to draw that picture for me?
Me: What? I did.
Client: No, the real one. Like the one that you drew of yourself.
Me: Uhhhh…
I end up working on another, much more time-consuming piece. I ask for the client to provide photo reference and even pose reference of how they would like to look (since I know that they’re particular). I work on a more stylised drawing.
Me: Ok, here are a few sketches. Choose the one you like most and I’ll finish it.
Client: It doesn’t look like me. Can you make it look more like me?
Me: Less cartoony? More realistic?
Client: More like me.
I redraw the drawing in a more realistic style. I produce two un-rendered pieces to choose from because I know that my client is particular.
Client: You used the wrong photo. I’ll get you a different one.
Me: You gave me both of these photos and I drew both of them for you. Are you telling me they’re both wrong?
Client: Yeah. Let me get you another one.
After one ink drawing, two sketch drawings and two renderings I am actually tracing the photo by this stage. Shame on me but I am mad and not getting paid.
Me: Here is your drawing.
Client: It doesn’t look like me. Can you make it look more like me?
Me: This is actually traced directly from your photo. This is how you look.
Client: (a long silence) …Ok just change the eyes to look more like me.
I change the eyes to look less like her.
Me: Here. It’s you.
Client: It’s great! I’m really close to reaching my new follower landmark on my main page. How soon can you finish it by?
Me: Finish?
Client: Yeah, like, with color?
So now, apparently she expects me to color it. I move around my schedule to get it done, and hand it over. I say that I don’t have any more time for any changes the just have to have the piece as it is. I’m done. After a few days, I get a message from my client.
Client: The picture’s great! I’ve uploaded it now.
I check to see if the post got any attention. As it turns out, she uploaded the piece to her Instagram story. The piece is online for only 24 hours (less time than it took to draw it) and if they click her story, and then it disappears forever. It took me longer to make this piece.
I’m so done.