I’m a freelance writer. Last week I was contacted by a massage therapist. She was doing “exotic” massage and needed “cool and shiny” introductory text to her website that would attract clients on the web.
Among her requirements was the slightest suggestion that there was the POSSIBILITY of providing sexual services.
This wasn’t really my speciality, but I gave it a shot. I drew on some old literature training and tried to solve the problem by including several passages from Catullus and Sappho for a classy kind of saucy.
While she initially liked and even accepted the text, she stiffed me on the pay, saying it failed the “trial period.” It happens, and I wasn’t even upset because she didn’t owe me much at all (it wasn’t much work). I completely forgot about it until yesterday when she wrote an angry letter:
Client: Your writing is terrible! The only customers it’s gotten me were four guys who wanted me to read them poems.