I get a message from a family friend:
Client: I need this logo, and it should be really, really easy. Can you do it?
Me: Sure, send me the details.
Client: It’s going to be embroidered on a hat. I want it to have a bench and a tree and rocks on both sides of the bench and a flag in the background and gradients and grass. I’ve made a sketch.
It’s a VERY detailed sketch. Done small, embroidered, it would look a mess.
Me: …and all of this is going on a hat… embroidered?
Me: It’ll probably look better if we make it a little simpler. This isn’t going to work well for what you want.
Client: Thanks! When can you have it done?
I decide to let it be their problem.
Me: …next week?
Client: That long? OK, it’ll be fine, I guess…
I send it over, based on the drawing. I ask for feedback. Three weeks pass.
Client: Sorry, I’ve been busy. Why is the bench so short? Why are the rocks so large? The flag needs to be a triangle. I don’t want grass. Can you get it done quickly?
Everything looked like the sketch. But I make changes. Another three weeks pass.
Client: I didn’t see this until now. The flag needs to be a rectangle and bigger, and change the colours to something less obnoxious. The bench needs to be shorter and the rocks larger. Why are they so small? Where’s the grass?
I make changes. Again. Two weeks pass.
Client: When will you be done?
Me: I already sent it.
Client: Oh right! Just take away the flag. The grass must be taller. Can you change the colour of the bench to red, and the grass to a more autumn-yellow and can you make it look like the grass is blowing in the breeze? And the rocks should be more of a green-grey than a grey-grey, and three more shades on each would be cool.
This basically went on for about three months. By which time it felt like pulling all my teeth at once.
I never saw evidence of a hat. Probably because they realised it didn’t work.