HOMEPODCAST
SUBMIT STORY

When I first started working at a business as a contract graphic designer, the director of the company (who I'd never met before) approached me. This is verbatim our conversation.

Client: Do you know who I'm married to? The Owner of [another agency in town]. We met while working together awhile back. 

She said this boldly and defiantly, for some reason.

Me: Ah... oh. Wow.

I was kind of stunned that she was even bringing this up in our initial conversation as making a point of being dominant. 

Client: Well, I don't know how you got hired here. I just don't see it.

She said this in a boasting manner. I don't even know if she'd seen my work.

She had a wonderful way of alienating a new contractor on the job.

0

Me: Here’s a moodboard filled with existing logos. Tell me which ones you like and don’t like and why.

Client: Okay, I like these  and I don’t like those.

Me: Great! I’m going to use your feedback to help me design custom logo concepts.

Client: Okay!

Me: Here are six logo concepts based on your feedback on the mood board

Client: I hate these logos and I hated everything on the mood board.

Me: Then why did you say you liked some of the ones on the mood board?

Client: Um...uh...I didn’t want to hurt your feelings

0

Client: We need something fresh and original to stand out in 2020.

Me: Here are couple of designs.

Client: Looks great. But I think we should do something like this other company made.

0

I work as a designer in a medium-size cosmetics company.  Sometimes I get offers from startups to make projects for their brand. Recently I got this good offer from one client who told me that he paid well and he lived close to me. 

Client: I have this new Luxury cosmetic I want it to go big. The product is great and it will make a lot of money.

I can't say the brand name but it had "Luxury" in the product line name.

Client: I want you to make marketing materials for it.

Me: So do you need a product design?

Client: No I already have it. I need you to promote it online. You use some luxury models and make it look like a product for rich people.

Me: ...Soooo can you show me the product?

The client opened his bag and put on the table the most standard cheap shampoo bottle you would find on a store shelf with a poorly designed logo and name with cheap "fake gold" gradient printing.

Me: ...

Client: Well, what do you think?

Me: I think it looks very cheap. the bottle is standard cheap plastic, the sticker has poor design and bad print quality.

Client: That is why I need you for. So you can make it look great on photos.

I turn the packaging around and read the ingredients. There was basically nothing unique about his formula, and it reproduced what you can find on store shelves.

Me: There is nothing special about the stuff you are selling. Why you are trying to make something for the Luxury market when there is nothing Luxury about your product.

His eyes bulged and his face got red with anger. I think I was the first person to push back with reality.

Client: Bu-bu-but there is...

Me: What ?

Client: The Name and the Price

At this point, I advised him not to waste money on his product and left.

0

I started working with a client at his office, and he had many complaints about his son, who had previously worked at the office. 

The noticed that the client was arrogant, self-absorbed, and very scattered. He would give me inadequate instruction and then get mad at me for not reading his mind. Worse, he constantly complained about his son.

Client: I don't even want my son around here anymore. He has schizophrenia or something. He's really not well. I don't want you to meet him.

Me: I'm sorry to hear that. Maybe he's just going through a tough time. He could get better.

Client: I doubt it. He's all messed up. He drank too much and did too many drugs in college I think.

Me: ...I see. Well, he could recover.

Client: Probably not.

I met his son briefly at the office not long after that conversation. He seemed nice and pretty normal.

Meanwhile, the client was easily angered, and was demanding and controlling.

Client: Here, you can move over to this desk, where my son used to sit.

I started to become familiar with the workspace. I opened one of the drawers and a note with a mental health hotline number was left in it with the son's handwriting. A note written while seated four feet from his father. 

I could sort of see why. 

0

Client: Looks great, just one thing, can we make the spaces in the paragraphs bigger please? Sorry, I'm a stickler for these things. I'm a real layout nerd.

Me: OK, when you say the spaces in the paragraphs, do you want me to increase the leading, or increase the size of the line breaks between the paragraphs?

Client: I don't know what those terms mean, but but make the spaces between the paragraphs a little bigger, larger, wider.

Some layout nerd...

0

I was working on the marketing strategy of an organization to recruit new members.

Me: I notice that your website talks a lot about "belief" but it doesn't really say anything substantive. Maybe we can actually try to be more specific in your materials?

Client: We'd like to go another direction. 

I further researched the organization and found many online reviews by people who had previously been involved, stating the organization encouraged people to suspend rational thought, included a lot of groupthink and demanded blindly following leadership in ways that were not psychologically healthy. A few used the word "cult." Bullet dodged. 

0

Client: Shall we send an email to inform them online ads are live? 

Me: Why?

Client: How else will they know?

0

Me: (long email with detailed information in clear and professional language)

Client: Haha. brooooo that is soooo money!!!! awesome

Verbatim.

0

I was driving to work when there was a very bad accident in front of me. The road was closed as no vehicles could pass and we just had to wait until the scene was cleared. I called my client to tell her I'd be late:

Client: (angrily) you should have predicted that accident and left home earlier! 

0
Menu