Client: My computer at home probably has a virus or something, so the new website doesn’t load properly. Can you change the website so it will load properly?
I later found out the client was running Internet Explorer 8 on Windows XP.
I had been working with a new client on a logo redesign. Typically, my logo process starts with 1-2 rounds of concept sketches before we move on to a more polished single concept. This client seemed particularly indecisive- he would like one concept and then a few hours later, he wouldn’t like it anymore; he can’t tell me why, what aspects he likes, what aspects he hates, he just “isn’t feeling it anymore”. We are SIX rounds of sketches in (paid hourly, thankfully), which comes to about 36 different logo concepts, and then this conversation occurs:
Client: I think that the latest one is one to explore…
Client: Maybe not though… people don’t seem to like it, haha.
Me: Who, exactly?
Client: I'm uploading these to Facebook and getting people to vote on them.
Me: So I have a committee of hundreds judging my designs?
Me: That explains a lot.
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My co-worker and I were developing a website for a client that wanted people who were blind to be able to use it. The scenario was that they use screen readers to navigate the site. We were going through some bugs they found.
Client: So one thing we noticed is that when the screen reader highlights the “close” button, it obscures it. We think people using screen readers will find this inconvenient.
Me: …So you’re saying that people who use screen readers won’t be able to see the close button.
Me: And, just to clarify, we are assuming that people who are using the screen readers are blind?
Me: I don’t think blind people will have an issue with not being able to seen something on the screen.
My co-worker muted the phone and we started laughing.
I work as an Engineer in Solution Integration Company helping a client’s IT personnel in figuring out how to administrate the newly integrated network infrastructure.
I ended up having to write 80 pages manual for the personnel outlining key points despite the fact that there are extensive documentation online provided by the product.
Client: I have tried to fiddle with the system according to your provided manual, Could you elaborate on this point on how do I input MAC address here? What format do I need to use?
I thought it was partly my fault because I did show him where this function is but I did not elaborate on it. I thought it was self-explanatory.
To remind myself, I tested it with a few different formats: XX-XX-XX-XX-XX-XX, XX:XX:XX:XX:XX:XX and XXXXXXXXXXXX. All of them worked.
So I am about 100000% sure the personnel would have figured this out by himself if he had tried at all.
We rendered an image of some industrial equipment. In real life the equipment being stored is orange, and the storage rack is grey and blue. The orange was dominating the image, so we did the whole thing in a stylish blue duotone.
The client understood the rationale for the duotone, but could not see past the fact that we’d removed the orange.
Client: What if you did it in orange, but with a blue hue?
I work as an in-house designer at a small-business and the owner is of the mindset that the more information (read: words) you cram in a design the more effective it is yet she constantly complains all of my designs are “too wordy” and that "no one will read that.“
She even complains about designs featuring copy she gave me verbatim. I’ve made more minimalistic and clean designs for her which she initially likes but then slowly has me add more and more information.
In a last-ditch effort to show her the light, I showed her a poster another company had dropped off to display in the window - minimalistic, stylish, and eye-catching with all the pertinent information and a link to a more detailed website.
Client: I really like it but you can’t even tell what it’s for
Me: …Well the large text at the top tells you what the event is and the writing underneath gives time and date and a short description with a link.
Client: Oh, well I didn’t read it, too much to read.
Client: Could you create my new website?
Me: What kind of budget do you have?
Client: Well, my friend did this one.
He pointed at his early 2000s site.
Client: He charged me a beer, so I guess I could give you 20 euros?
Me: Ok, for 20 euros I can tell you all the things you have to learn to create it on your own.
Client: Wow, you’ll teach me?
Me: No. I’ll tell you what you’d have to learn. That’s worth 20 euros.
I work as a freelance writer part-time to help pay bills since my boyfriend is living with me. I do editing for both fiction and nonfiction.
I got an email from a prospective client last Wednesday, who sent me a small part of their story to look over and see if I could edit it. I require this from pretty much everyone unless I know them.
This was an Eldritch Abomination in written form.
The spelling and grammar were atrocious. The name was spelled wrong. There was shitty clipart everywhere.
Me: I’m sorry, but given the scope of this job I won’t be able to complete it for what you’re offering.
Client: (furious) You’re being unfair! Fine. Be a snobby bitch. Your work is probably shitty anyway.
I am about to quit my job as a volunteer graphic designer at a non-profit yoga institute for several reasons, and each day I am reminded of a new one.
Here is a snippet of the conversation I just had with our guru (who I have been working with for seven weeks on a 26 page photo biography booklet) about the 14th revision of the cover design:
Client: I am so glad you are doing this for free! We had to pay thousands of dollars for our old designer.