Me: So, what type of logo are you looking for? Something professional, fun, simple, elegant, animated, vectorized…?
Me: I’m sorry, but what do you mean by yes?
Client: I want all of those descriptions.
Me: Umm, can you give me more insight on what you are looking for?
Client: I want something professional, but fun. Simple, but elegant. And I am not sure what vectorized means, but it sounds good.
Me: Ok… let’s start with the color scheme. What are the primary colors you want in your logo?
Client: I’m not sure. Just make something good and I’ll know when I see it.
"The arrows aren’t scholarly enough."
"Remove some hyphens. Not sure which ones, but you should know."
"I’m quite arty so I’m going to be really helpful… I want a Quentin Blake/Downtown Abbey blend with a touch of William Morris"
I was doing headshots of physicians for a local hospital.
Client: Yeah, this is no good. You need to Photoshop this one. He looks too mysterious.
Client: Yes. We don’t want our doctors looking mysterious.
I still haven’t figured out what they meant by “mysterious”. I ended up removing a few crow’s feet and that seemed to suffice in removing any “mystery”.
"I’d like to see more shapes."
"We were very clear that we wanted a ‘burned’ paper look. This paper looks like it was scorched by fire."
Client: I want this done by the end of the week! It’s taking forever!
Me: I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you wanted it done so soon. In our initial discussion about the job, you said there was “no huge rush.”
Client: To me “no huge rush” means “not today.”
Me: I’ve attached four different options for the cover page. Please let me know which one you prefer so I can purchase the relevant stock image. I’ve provided the cost of each image below for your convenience. Thanks.
One week later.
Client: Yes, I like the images.
I have been working with a client on a logo for her firm. She seemed directionless, but after meeting for a few hours, we developed a design brief. After I’d presented sketches – using the brief she’d signed off on – she “played around with it a little bit” and sent me back a sketch that had nothing to do with the brief.
After another face to face meeting, I agreed to work with the new concept. Really, the only thing that stayed the same was a request for hand-lettered typography, which I felt I already had in the bag. I drafted a proposal and presented a final sketch. She “played around with it a little bit” and sent me a PDF with the main design element of the logo removed and a delicate type solution that was not only unreadable, but would not work as hand-lettering - the look she originally was after.
I told her that she’d come up with something really interesting and felt she could finish it herself since she had such a clear vision and was now so close.
She requested that I "play around with it a little bit and see what you come up with.”
I fired myself.